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Re: Please help! Is my mom bipolar?

Re: Please help! Is my mom bipolar?

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Posted by margaret on October 23, 2000 at 21:56:57:

In Reply to: Please help! Is my mom bipolar? posted by Tammy on October 01, 2000 at 00:25:52:

I grew up with a very difficult mother as well, and I, like you, think that my mother is bipolar. I myself am bipolar, which leads me even more to believe that bipolar disorder is the cause for my mother's drinking, depression, rages, irrational screaming fits, credit card debt, etc. I feel guilty because I have been lucky enough to get help, and I'm doing well because I have gotten good care. My mother has never been diagnosed. Because she is so manipulative and narcissistic and because nothing is ever her fault, always someone else's fault, she has never stayed still long enough to let someone diagnose her. I am the official sick one in the family. I guess you can hear some of the bitterness in my voice, but beneath that there is a lot of sadness. She is my mother and I love her more than anything.

This is all to say, you are not alone. I am not saying your mother is bipolar or anything else. How would I know? Obviously there are many differences between our situations. You are not bipolar, so be glad for that. But from what you say, I know it's hard, and I know that you must be torn apart by it. The saddest thing is that you cannot save her. Even if you knew for sure that she was bipolar, there would be nothing you could do except express your love and concern. She has to be the one to get help.

I found that Alanon, which is for families of alcoholics, was very helpful in getting me to come to terms with living with an alcoholic, which my mother also is. But overall 12-step programs are about learning to let go with love, and that really helped me.

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