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Re: wives of stroke patients

Re: wives of stroke patients

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Posted by Sandy on August 06, 2000 at 17:29:50:

In Reply to: Re: wives of stroke patients posted by frances on August 05, 2000 at 17:16:04:

: : : would like to talk with women whose husbands have had strokes. what is the recovery like for you? has your husband recovered but changed at the same time.please email or leave message.

: : My husband had a stroke almost 3 years ago. I devoted lots of time to his recovery for the first 6 months and actually still give him lots of time and effort. Dave's stroke was very major and affected him with language problems. It is very hard on him and then of course it is for me too, mostly because of his frustration. He has recovered SO very much compared to the damage in the beginning, but we realize there will be permanent damage. His personality is almost unchanged from what it was before the stroke and I feel very blessed for that. Is that where you are having a difficult time? I think a stroke is about the most devastating injury, but then I haven't had to deal with others.....

: : What is your biggest concern? I will be glad to talk with you at my e:mail address if you want.
: : -sandy
: Sandy,
: Thanks so much for responding. I really have no one to talk to on this subject that would understand.My husband had his stroke two years agoe.They said he would recover fully. Physically he may have, there is no obvious damage there. But his mind is another thing. Sometimes his thinking is totally backwards. He was very intelligent before his stroke, now he gets confused easilly.I think he tries to conpensate for this by trying to do more around the house. Every time I turn around I bump into him. He is still very kind and caring person. But after the Storke I think I grieved for several months because I missed the old person he use to be. My husband is 53 years old, I am 49 and we have been together for 10 years. Guess I got use to him being the care taker, then things were turned around. You are right, Strokes are the worst thing that can happen, brain damage is very strange and so is the rebuilding. would like to talk again sometime. frances

Did your husband have any therapy? Did they diagnose him with Aphasia? sounds like it with the "backwards thing." Dave speaks in opposites alot (although not as much as he did in the beginning) I know exactly how you feel about the care-giver.... Dave cannot work again -- he can't understand direction and his stamina wouldn't be good. I know it is extremely hard on the men that they cannot be the person who protects us, but we are ALLOWED to hurt too. Dave and I had been married 25 years--he was 49 years old and I was 44 when it happened. I don't like the role reversal, but I appreciate that I still have my husband (Dave could have so very easily died from his stroke -- he had surgery during evolution of the stroke. Had the surgery not happened, I don't think he would be with me.)

Maybe you could write me at my e:mail address, so we can talk more and help each other. Sounds like our situations are pretty similiar. -sandy [email protected]

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